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    Can’t take it with you

I hadn’t even considered being an organ donor until I was faced with making the decision to donate the organs of my mother when she passed. I decided that because she was a giver in life; donating her organs would be an affirmation of the manner in which she had lived her life. I was however, somewhat taken aback by the response of my family when they found out what I had done. They were appalled that I would make such a decision and let me know how very vehemently they were opposed. I would like to think that their reaction stemmed from the grief we all were feeling at the time. Most assuredly, I can attest to the fact that sorrow strips you down to buck naked and leaves you sensitive and vulnerable to a wide range of emotions. But upon doing further research, I have found that traditionally we as African Americans do not opt to be organ donors. A startling revelation considering the fact that there are nearly 22,000 African Americans on the national waiting list for organ transplants, and only 827 African Americans registered as donors in the state of Florida. In comparison, there are nearly 42,000 white Americans on the list for organ donation and 4,664 registered donors.

What is the connection we have to life after death? With the spirit only residing in the earthly body until it transcends into its heavenly home, why is our community so attached to a mere shell? We revere the dead as sacred. I can recall going to a funeral of a young friend years ago. His girlfriend, consumed with grief, did everything she could to get his body out of that coffin. My heart broke for her and I almost wanted to hug her and tell her, “Honey, he’s not in there anymore.” Admittedly, it did take me some time to fully accept my decision to donate my mothers’ organs. Initially, my family’s repeated opposition made me question my own decision. Even though I knew she no longer needed that body and other people would benefit from the tissue collected, I still had doubts. But upon becoming more informed, I relaxed in what I now know to be the right decision. So many different people benefit from just one donation. Skin grafts are used for reconstructive surgery for burn victims, cosmetic repairs for accident victims and to help babies that are born with birth defects. Bone tissue is used to help cancer patients, relieve pain and to correct bone defects. One donation can bless and benefit a patient directly or aid in the area of research. More of us need to be registered donors.

In an effort to comfort me after my mother passed away people would tell me how she was still alive in my heart. It didn’t comfort me then because the grief was too heavy. But now in addition to understanding that her memory does live on in my heart, I have the added comfort of knowing that my decision to extend her life to others by donating her organs was exactly what she was; a blessing. In life she was the type of person that would give you her last and now…even in death…she is still giving.
 

                                                                 by Bridgette Hogan
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Bridgette is a contributing writer of Blacksonville.com